Saturday, September 20, 2003

This is something interesting that I found on the net... Some facts it seemed...

Here are my useless facts:

When Coca-Cola began to be sold in China, they used characters that would sound like "Coca-Cola" when spoken. Unfortunately, what they turned out to mean was "Bite the wax tadpole". It did not sell well.
The glue on Israeli postage stamps is certified kosher.
No word in the English language rhymes with month, orange, silver, and purple.
Mel Blanc (the voice of Bugs Bunny) was allergic to carrots.
More people are killed annually by donkeys than die in air crashes.
The Hawaiian alphabet only has 12 letters.
A duck’s quack doesn’t echo, and no one knows why.
If you have three quarters, four dimes, and four pennies, you have $1.19. You also have the largest amount of money in coins without being able to make change for a dollar.
Pepsi originally contained pepsin, thus the name.
The original story from "Tales of 1001 Arabian Nights" begins, "Aladdin was a little Chinese boy."
Michael Jordan makes more money from NIKE annually than all of the Nike factory workers in Malaysia combined.
The volume of the earth's moon is the same as the volume of the Pacific Ocean.
Spiral staircases in medieval castles are running clockwise. This is because all knights used to be right-handed. When the intruding army would climb the stairs they would not be able to use their right hand which was holding the sword because of the difficulties of climbing the stairs. Left-handed knights would have had no troubles, except left-handed people could never become knights because it was assumed that they were descendants of the devil.
Ham radio operators got the term "ham" coined from the expression "ham fisted operators," a term used to describe early radio users who sent Morse code (i.e., pounded their fist).
The slogan on New Hampshire license plates is "Live Free or Die." These license plates are manufactured by prisoners in the state prison in Concord.
Chinese Crested dogs can get acne.
Hydrogen gas is the least dense substance in the world, at 0.08988g/cc.
Hydrogen solid is the most dense substance in the world, at 70.6g/cc.
Each year there is one ton of cement poured for each man woman and child in the world.
The house fly hums in the middle octave key of F.
The only capital letter in the Roman alphabet with exactly one end point is P.
The giant red star Betelgeuse has a diameter larger than that of the Earth's orbit around the sun.
The longest place name still in use is: Taumatawhakatangihangaoauauotameteaturipukakapikimaungahoronukupokai- whenuakitanatahu--a New Zealand hill.
Los Angeles's full name is: "El Pueblo de Nuestra Senora la Reina de los Angeles de Poriuncula" and can be abbreviated to 3.63% of its size, "LA."
Only 1 in 2,000,000,000 will live to be 116 or older.
An ostrich's eye is bigger than its brain.
Tigers have striped skin, not just striped fur.
According to Einstein's Special Theory of Relativity, it is possible to go slower than light and faster than light, but it is impossible to go the speed of light. Also, there is a particle called tackyon which is supposed to go faster than light. This means if you fire a tackyon beam, it travels before you fire it.
When you tie a noose, the rope is wrapped twelve times around because it's the same length as a persons head.
Hummingbirds are the only animal that can fly backwards.
A cat's jaw cannot move sideways.
If she were life size, Barbie's measurements are: 39-23-33.
"Dreamt" is the only English word that ends in the letters "mt".
All 50 states are listed across the top of the Lincoln Memorial on the back of the $5 bill.
Almonds are members of the peach family.
Winston Churchill was born in a ladies' room during a dance.
Maine is the only state whose name is just one syllable.
There are only four words in the English language which end in"-dous": tremendous, horrendous, stupendous, and hazardous.
A cat has 32 muscles in each ear.
In most advertisements, including newspapers, the time displayed on a watch is 10:10.
Al Capone's business card said he was a used furniture dealer.
The only real person to be a Pez head was Betsy Ross.
The characters Bert and Ernie on Sesame Street were named after Bert the cop and Ernie the taxi driver in Frank Capra's "Its A Wonderful Life"
A goldfish has a memory span of three seconds.
A dime has 118 ridges around the edge.
On an American one-dollar bill, there is an owl in the upper right-hand corner of the "1" encased in the "shield" and a spider hidden in the front upper right-hand corner.
The giant squid has the largest eyes in the world.
Who's that playing the piano on the "Mad About You" theme? Why it's Paul Reiser himself.
The male gypsy moth can "smell" the virgin female gypsy moth from 1.8 miles away.
The name for Oz in the "Wizard of Oz" was thought up when the creator, Frank Baum, looked at his filing cabinet and saw A-N, and O-Z, hence "Oz."
The microwave was invented after a researcher walked by a radar tube and a chocolate bar melted in his pocket.
Mr. Rogers is an ordained minister.
John Lennon's first girlfriend was named Thelma Pickles.
The average person falls asleep in seven minutes.
There are 336 dimples on a regulation golf ball.
A rainbow can occur only when the sun is 40 degrees or less above the horizon.
Penguins can jump as high as 6 feet in the air.
When spelt phonetically, Esso means stalled car in Japan.
Tigers have round pupils and yellow irises (except for the blue eyes of white tigers). Due to a retinal adaptation that reflects light back to the retina, the night vision of tigers is six times better than that of humans.
In 1949, forecasting the relentless march of science, Popular Mechanics said "Computers in the future may weigh no more than 1.5 tons."
If the Loch Ness monster exists at all, he (or she) could only be about as big as a sixth grader. A new study shows that there is only enough fish in the loch to feed a 31 kg (about 67 lb) creature. The scientists used sonar to estimate the number of fish in the lake and came up with an annual food supply of 93 kg. Since a cold blooded animal like Nessie would need to eat about three times its body weight each year, it could only weigh about 31 kg.
Polar bears are left-handed.
Heinz Catsup leaving the bottle travels at 25 miles per year.
The maximum weight for a golf ball is 1.62 oz.
Only 1/3 of the people that can twitch their ears can twitch only one at a time.
The largest city in the United States with a one syllable name is Flint, Michigan.
The number of the trash compactor in Star Wars is 3263827.
Grapes explode when you put them in the microwave.
"Evian" spelled backvards is naive.
Charles de Gaulle's final words were, "It hurts."
Alexander the Great was an epileptic.
A donkey will sink in quicksand but a mule won't.
Napoleon constructed his battle plans in a sandbox.
The face of a penny can hold about thirty drops of water.
If you feed a seagull Alka-Seltzer, its stomach will explode.
Pigs can become alcoholics.
In Michigan, USA, a man legally owns his wife's hair.
Only 55% of all Americans know that the sun is a star.
"Kemo Sabe" means "soggy shrub" in Navajo.
A blue whale's tongue weighs more than an elephant.
There are more than 1,000 chemicals in a cup of coffee. Of these, only 26 have been tested, and half-caused cancer in rats.
The waste produced by one chicken in its lifetime can supply enough electricity to run a 100-watt bulb for five hours.
It takes 12,000 head of cattle to produce one pound of adrenaline.
55,700 people in the US are injured by jewelry each year.
In the past 60 years, the groundhog has only predicted the weather correctly 28% of the time. The rushing back and forth from burrows is believed to indicate sexual activity, not shadow seeking.
Turkeys will peck to death members of the flock that are physically inferior or different.
In Miami, Florida, roosting vultures have taken to snatching poodles from rooftop patios.
Back in 1919 the Russian transplant pioneer Serge Voronoff made headlines by grafting monkey testicles onto human males.
111,111,111 multiplied by 111,111,111 equals 12,345,678,987,654,321.
The average human has about 20 square feet of skin weighing about 6 pounds.
There is now an ATM at McMurdo Station in Antarctica, which has a winter population of 200.
Bulgaria was the only soccer team in the 1994 World Cup in which all 11 players' last names ended with the letters "OV."
The actor who played the T-1000 in Terminator 2 (Robert Patrick) and the lead singer of Filter are brothers.
Zip code 12345 is assigned to General Electric in Schenectady, N.Y.
The letter J does not appear anywhere on the periodic table of the elements.
Jackals have one more pair of chromosomes than dogs or wolves.
The word "lethologica" describes the state of not being able to remember the word you want.
Basenji dogs and Australian dingoes are virtually identical.
The same man who led the attack on the Alamo, Mexican Military General, Antonio Lopez de Santa Anna, is also credited with the invention of chewing gum.
A top freestyle swimmer achieves a speed of only 4 miles per hour. Fish, in contrast, have been clocked at 68 mph.
500,000 tons of dog excrement are dumped annually on the streets of Paris.
The typical laboratory mouse runs 2.5 miles per night on its treadmill.
A 5 ft. 5 inch tall 27-year-old woman weighing in at 374 pounds outflabbed 1,000 competitors to win the title of fattest person in China. Her prize - a supply of diet food.
The average US worker toils for two hours and 47 minutes of each working day just to pay income tax. Indeed, the average American pays more in taxes than for food, clothing and shelter put together.
The longest recorded flight of a chicken is thirteen seconds.
Thomas Edison was afraid of the dark.
In the U.S. there is, on average, three sex change operations per day.
It only takes a male horse 14 seconds to copulate.
A pregnant goldfish is called a twit.
A group of crows is called a murder.
There are 336 dimples on a regulation golf ball.
Rabbits and Horses cannot vomit.
The names of all the continents end with the letter they start with.
About a third of all Americans flush the toilet while they're still sitting on it.
A Saudi Arabian woman can get a divorce if her husband doesn't give her coffee.
The Neanderthal's brain was bigger than yours is.
Donald Duck comics were banned from Finland because he doesn't wear pants.
Dragonflies have a life span of only 24 hours.
Elephants are the only animal that can't jump.
In L.A., U.S.A., a man may legally beat his wife with a leather strap, as long as it is less than 2 inches wide.
1/3 of Taiwanese funeral processions includes a stripper.
Dolphins sleep with one eye open.
The palms of your hands and the soles of your feet cannot tan.
No piece of paper can be folded in half more than 7 times.
The radioactive substance, Americanium - 241 is used in many smoke detectors.
The parachute was invented by Leonardo da Vinci in 1515.
Your stomach has to produce a new layer of mucus every two weeks otherwise it will digest itself.
Every Swiss citizen is required by law to have a bomb shelter or access to a bomb shelter.
Rennin, the enzyme obtained from the fourth stomach of a cow and used chiefly in the manufacture of cheese, is capable of coagulating more than 25,000 times its weight of fresh milk.
Tomatoes and cucumbers are fruits.
There is a place in Norway called "Hell".
Penguins can jump as high as 6 feet in the air.
There are more than 1,000 chemicals in a cup of coffee. Of these, only 26 have been tested, and half caused cancer in rats.
The average ice berg weighs 20,000,000 tons.
In Italy, a campaign for Schweppes Tonic Water translated the name into Schweppes Toilet Water.
The list of ingredients that make up lipstick scales.
Ants do not sleep.
In Texas, it's illegal to put graffiti on someone else's cow.
The USA bought Alaska from Russia for 2 cents an acre.
The first letters of the months July through November, in order, spell the name JASON.
No other animal gives us more by-products than the hog. These by-products include pig suede, buttons, glass, paint brushes, crayons, chalk, and insulation to name a few.
Cockroaches' favorite food is the glue on envelopes and on the back of postage stamps
If a statue in the park of a person on a horse has both front legs in the air, the person died in battle; if the horse has one front leg in the air, the person died as a result of wounds received in battle; if the horse has all four legs on the ground, the person died of natural causes.
Flush toilets date back to 2000 B.C.
The flatulation from domesticated cows produce about 30% of the methane on this planet.
Only 2 more blue moons (the saying "only once in a blue moon" refers to the occurence of two full moons during one calender month) are to occur between now and 2001. Those times are January 1999 and March 1999.
Hitler and Napolean both had only one testical.
Chimpanzees used in AIDS vaccine studies get a pension of more than $100,000 to pay for their care and containment for the duration of their natural lives. While it is possible to infect chimpanzees with HIV, they do not appear to get AIDS.
Even if you cut off a cockroach's head, it can live for several weeks.
Some toothpastes contain antifreeze.
A whale's penis is called a dork.
Armadillos are the only animal besides humans that can get leprosy.
The Mad Hatter in Alice in Wonderland was a symbolic character for the hat makers in towns of the late 1800's. The large felt hats of the day had supports made out of lead. The lead caused an organic form of psychosis (brain damage) to develop in the hat makers causing them to be declared crazy.
Some biblical scholars believe that Aramaic, the language of the ancient Bible, did not contain an easy way to say "many things" and used a term which has come down to us as 40. This means that when the bible -- in many places -- refers to "40 days," they meant many days.
Texas was once a country.
If you live in Michigan, did you know it's illegal to place a skunk inside your bosses desk?
In Kentucky, it is illegal to carry ice cream in your back pocket.
Everyday, more money is printed for Monopoly than the U.S. Treasury.
In the 19th century, the British Navy attempted to dispel the superstition that Friday is an unlucky day to embark on a ship. The keel of a new ship was laid on a Friday, she was named H.M.S. Friday, commanded by a Captain Friday, and finally went to sea on a Friday. Neither the ship nor her crew were ever heard of again.
Cats have over 100 vocal sounds, whereas, dogs only have about 10.
In 1681, the last dodo bird died.
Colgate faced a big obstacle marketing toothpaste in Spanish speaking countries. Colgate translates into the command "go hang yourself."
"Bookkeeper" is the only word in English language with three consecutive double letters.
There are more Barbie dolls in Italy than there are Canadians in Canada!
Emus cannot walk backwards.
The name Jeep came from the abbreviation used in the army for the "General Purpose" vehicle, G.P.
It is physically impossible for pigs to look up into the sky.
The YKK on the zipper of your Levis stands for Yoshida Kogyo Kabushibibaisha, the worlds largest zipper manufacturer.
97% of all paper money in the US contains traces of cocaine.
To force a tortoises' legs from its shell to treat it, you need to place your finger up it's bottom...
It is estimated that Americans will consume 10 million tons of Turkey on Thanksgiving day. Due to turkey's high sulphur content, Americans will also produce enough gas to fly a fleet of 75 Hindenbergs from L.A. to New York in 24 hours.
The slang word 'crap' came from T. Crapper, the man who invented the modern toilet.
The wingspan of a Boeing 747 is longer than the Wright brothers' first flight.
If you fart consistantly for 6 years and 9 months, enough gas is produced to create an atomic bomb.
Approximately 97.35618329% of all statistics are made up...
You are more likely to be killed by a champagne cork than by a poisonous spider
The little bags of netting for gas lanterns (called 'mantles') are radioactive -- so much so that they will set of an alarm at a nuclear reactor.
A bomb dropped by the Allies on Berlin during World War II killed every animal in the Berlin Zoo except the elephant, which escaped and roamed the city. When a Russian commander saw hungry Germans chasing the elephant and trying to kill it, he ordered his troops to protect it and shoot anyone who tried to kill it
Dueling is legal in Paraguay as long as both parties are registered blood donors.
Carnivorous animals will not eat another animal that has been hit by a lightning strike.
Cat's urine glows under a black light.
The first Ford cars had Dodge engines.
The dot over the letter 'i' is called a tittle.
To escape the grip of a crocodile's jaws, push your thumbs into its eyeballs-it will let you go instantly.
Reindeer like to eat bananas.
In England, the Speaker of the House is not allowed to speak.
The Sanskrit word for "war" means "desire for more cows."
The Boston University Bridge (on Commonwealth Avenue, Boston, Massachusetts) is the only place in the world where a boat can sail under a train driving under a car driving under an airplane.
Montpelier, Vermont is the only U.S. state capital without a McDonalds.
Nutmeg is extremely poisonous if injected intravenously
2.5 cans of Spam are consumed every second in the United States
Chevrolet tried marketing a Chevrolet Nova in spanish speaking countries. It didn't sell well because NOVA means "doesn't go" in spanish. (thanks to Selma!)
Every continent begins and ends in the same letter. eg AfricA, EuropE (and just to appease some idiot that didn't figure it out, in North and South America, i'm talking about the America part).
Every continent has a city called Rome.
The word "sophomore" means "sophisticated moron."

Thursday, September 18, 2003

I wold write a lottsa of things later... I am so tried schuttling from office to home.. Looking for the weekend


Monday, September 15, 2003

I am happppppppyyyyyyyyyyyy... First day in CTS... Wish I could type more.. I would continue the wonderful feel morrow.. I am so tired and morrow got to get up early and leave for work..

Wish me luck...

Cheers ~

Sunday, September 14, 2003

Great Evening on a memorable day.....

Well we are just back from what is a great evening.. Today was the wedding anniversary of my parents.. 30th Year of nuptial togetherness would go into the history books in couple of more hours time. This has been one good time we had together.

For the past 2 years I have not been with my parents when they were celebrating their anniversary.. Now got an opportunity to celebrate and we did it in a big way.. There is a hotel called the "The Residency Towers" near the Pondy Bazaar in chennai so that is were we decided to curdle and enjoy the evening...

I had around 6:00 booked a table for 3 in the The Residency. We reached that place at around 7:30 and only to understand that the Hotel Residency has another new branch near the Globus in T-Nagar. So then we had to go around the pondy baazaar to reach there.. Man, Initially I was overhauled by what I saw.. What a majestic place.. Went inside a serene enviorn though intimidating.. Spoke to bitchy indian gal in the front desk.. Fuck I cannot understand why this management in chennai compromise on the looks of the gals in the front desk.. She was not seductive, nor was she sexy, nor was she good-looking let alone the way she spoke... Crazy bitch I thought... That is where I stamped my authority.. I was told that the guy who took the call from me left home and I took charge and said "I want to speak to the Manager.. "... God knows what would have happened if the manager had come... Perhaps I would have said "Good Evening Politely:" Anyway as the saying goes you cannot keep a good man down.. So I was shown the way into another Mall like restaurant that they have. Basically hotel residency has a lot of chain restaurants..

Mama and papa were you know am-I-hungry-now kinds of gesture.. Finally we got a place to eat and then we started to hog... Nice place as such very good decors and interior finish.. result a big smooch in the ass when the bill came..Not that costly as the building looked.. But a nice time to say.. We took several fotos in the hotel..
So that was the way the went by.. Nice way to end I thought.. Earlier in the morning one of my mom's friend had called on to greet the couple, then told us to come to their home and she would treat us at Park Sheraton... I thought man now that is a treat.. Phew licking my fingers to get on to their house very soon... Heeee So mean of me but who cares I wanted to know how this park sheraton worked.. Nice way to test is it not..Hmmm...

Okies morrow have to go for work so I will go to sleep now.. Hopefully my 2nd stint here in the new work place would be good for me. Personally I want it that way.. lets see..

Cheers ~

Saturday, September 13, 2003


News is CTS has asked me to join on monday... Yippes.. After what I have been through this is one good break.. Frankly for me I want the same good feeling on the 19 november when I have the second round of the interview for my VISA.... Wish I get through this one unscathed....

Well in another few hours my parents would be celebrating their 30th Year of togetherness... Man, what a feeling.. I am here after 2 years to see and celebrate the day for real. Wish them all the best of health and wishes as always.

Apart from this my friend's mom is going to SFO on October 5, so I was busy packing on things for my sis and depositing it to them. It is always nice to go shopping and buying few things for these good looking days... Yes I said good-looking because what are good things after all, the ones that please our heart... So these things that I bought for my Sis who is in LAX is a good will feel.. Anyway away from these all...

One other friend of mine who appears for the interview come 13th november leaves morrow to the company where I used to work for 2.4 Years.. yeah the same sick company, satyam... he is also pissed off as such.. he also wants to come away from that place.. Anyway my only wish is that we could go together off for our studies..

I feel a bit attracted to the cozy bed and A/C now.. man chennai is getting hot when I was told it is winter now..Chennai knows only 3 tings hot hotter hotest.. Hmm.. the same cliché I think .. But that is how chennai is and would be..

Well one last thing the recent movie by shankar called "BOYS", a good honest movie on whatever is revealed was under the axe by some snobs in chennai.. I don't understand why people behave this way when they see the reality on the screen.. I think peopel here have to change, but cannot blame them that is how they have been all along what do you expect all on a sudden...
Frankly, this movie was a very good feel as such.. Whole bunch of new faces , great music nice effort in the end..

Thumps-up for the entire crew...

If I don't go now I would not go forever so I am leaving and going to hit the sac..

Cheers ~


Friday, September 12, 2003

Commemorating The Dreaded ...

September 11 was not as dazzling as it were last year.. I know I should not have used the word dazzling but I cannot help it as that is how the media is treating the day... Anyway whatever is attached to the Uncle Sam seems to draw some kind of attention.... Nothing unusual also happened that day not only in US but also in India... At times I get so pissed off when I get to think of the raw deal we nations in the 3rd world get... So very atypical of the other so called "super" powers..
But Sept. 11 : This day will go down in the history of the world as the most tragic day...Almost like a bad dream....A terrifying nightmare...BUT..Not to underride the significance of this day..It does happen to be a special day for some people...birthdays.....marriage anniversary.....or any special day that one might want to remember.....but listening to the radio...the TV and people around you just makes you feel a little low....well...maybe with time , the sadness associated with the day will become less....

I don't want this to look like a political agenda here.. Just my 2 cents though.

I came across a pretty interesting, could I say * deadly * site.. Yeah, the site is called DeathClock from another blogger called Deepa .. Strangely the best thing abt the site was it took some input and showed a big numerical string of 1357630948 seconds left for me to live??? Man, that is a ** shocker **.. A remainder based on some stupid intelligence....
A bad way to say that your stay on earth is being clocked..

CTS issue somehow has not worked positively for me till now..> They have not responded to me.. Fingers crossed until Monday when they have asked me to come to their office..

Frankly speaking I don't want to work any more.. I wanted to study and thanks to the august 5 that things have taken a strange U-Turn...
Hoping for the best as such..

Lets see.. More blogging later

Cheers ~

Tuesday, September 09, 2003

My feelings now.. Real ones.. I don't know who is going to read.. Hey what the heck this is my space and I have to write something.. something what I feel abt... The past 10 days has been misery filled.
It all started on august. On the 5th I got my VISA rejected.. Amazingly the questions that I was asked was stupid.I
was asked somehting like "Ohh you worked for Satyam ehh?" I told "Yes".. And you are Vikram? For which I vehemently shook my head to agree on the stand taken. Then he says you are going to the public university?.. Hmmmm.. I will not give you VISA...
Man, what sort of officers we have in the consulate. They say that they do a good job interviewing the candidates.. I am wonder struck since then unable to understand the philosophy behind this...
Soon after this I get an opportunity to appear for an Interview with CTS another giant in INDIA. Now that I have got through and just minutes before completing the joining formalities I am asked "Do you have the certificate from Satyam?"... I said NO coz that company did not give me one.. For which I was told then it is DIFFICULT to squeeze you in...
Bad luck somehow has started to like me for what I am !! Has been following me since I graduated in 2001. I thought SATYAM was a good company and joined only to realise later that it was GOOD on paper with a very poor man-administration... No good boss..but had lotsss of people whose weight partly was filled with king size ego..After 2.3 years of experience, I am told by this Stupid company that I would have to serve for another 3 years to get my 2.3 years work exp certificate ! Man what a deal....
Anyway, I should think of talking to the CTS people.. Just hope that lady luck smiles at me atleast once now after what all I had to go through...

Now sleepy .. will pen later.. Left everything to the man above..

Cheers ~

Monday, September 08, 2003

my last blog is admittedly too prolix,sanctimonious, what not

anyway, those of you who were jobless enough to read, thanks

i stand behind what i was trying to say

i other words, i've faced a lot of bitterness trying to MAKE things work the way i want
therefore, going with the tide is the best option
just letting things happen
lets see if that works at keeping my balance

anyway, a comment on my dear roomies
ive pissed them off so much that two of them are starting a blog named "totally anti chaosh"
am so flattered(mwahahahhahhhhhaa cough cough)
anyway my roomies still rock
my room consists of 5 guys
one quiet computer freak
one quiet balanced guy
one quiet new guy
one moderately noisy guy
and one call the cops level noisy one man circus, yes you guessed right, me

iam a circus
if i was watching myself i'd either laugh at myself or go huh?
well, am very noisy.
cant help it
i babble incoherently
make impromptu songs for friends to irritate them
do lots of monkey acting
my mom tells me i was too quiet as a kid
so i think all that repressed mischief is stretching the balloon of my roomies' collective sense of humour
and patience if i may add.
anyway all said and done we all heave collective sighs at the sheer boredom that keeps us from doing anything constructive(refer my old blog abt my roomies)

as i was saying..and as beck says in that song loser

"in the time of chimpanzees i was a monkey"

well, i was,am,really

if you ever happen to chance upon a photo of me in a group
iam the guy with the devil horn fingers tactfully placed at the sides of my head to add masala to an otherwise posing at funeral type atmosphere
um, a funeral and a guy trying to pass off as the devil ..hehe..

also, i have rather weird crazy tendencies

for eg, in chennai at one time i was so bored that

you notice how ppl signal to you that ur headlights are on in the daytime, and then you switch them off
well, i felt these ppl are very nice and deserve a reward
so to pick out all these nice ppl
i used to leave the headlight on
and ride thro
and everyone who signalled got a kiss blown from me
now WHY would i want to do something like that

also, screaming myself hoarse at public places
creating scenes etc

i also have an immense need to imitate accents
i just HAVE to
made enough enemies among desis, now gonna get shot by a southern son soon

i made such fun of my mallu prof's accent in chennai
i used to do her as a serial killer etc
you know..."iyum goayin do gill you, with a too tondy olt dee seey shoak"
"iam going to kill you, with a 220 volt DC shock"

anyway, she found out and once when i accidentally(maybe SHE did it!) managed to let 220V ac almost electrocute me in the lab,
she said, "somedimes you deseyrve itch"
(sometimes you deserve it)
and then i laughed

maybe i did deserve it

i have not flashed or streaked yet thankheavens

anyway...if you think i need ritalin, steal some from your hyperactive lil brother and send


anyway, dont really know what to write about today
exhausted as well
so will think of something more pertinent to say tomorrow

feeling a little nostalgic, in a not nice way of course
happened to notice my email acct was almost full so proceeded to delete certain emails ended up deleting mostly none.. what is it with us people we are so scared of the future that we cling to the past too much i know people who never throw things away they hate to see old moldy stuff lying around and when they pick it up to throw it away they cant and they wont anyway, this email thing is bad u see all the old messages you received and it takes u back to a time when things were drastically different so many things everything in fact

people have changed
people have left
people have arrived

its more often the little emails where you email ur best friend in office to get his ass out so you can go loaf around town that are more nostalgic simple simple years
they seemed complex at the time, though and you think you know people, you dont
friends have changed they have their own lives now u are just a biweekly phone call to some your closest friends remain your closest because to them you either matter, or they are too polite, but maybe you are too..

and pretty soon all will have families and what not reminds me of my ripe old age of 23

iam ALL of 23 now and i dont want to lose any memory ..iam not deleting emails
iam not a clinical, practical person of course, nothing is permanent, blah blah

however, for atleast a moment and until senility, they will remain in my head little things or maybe again..

remembering happier times , realizing that iam grown up now that i have to look out for myself etc etc.. is not fun at all maybe alzheimers is natures way of coping
maybe memory loss at old age is not such a bad thing if its this bad at 23, i dont want to think how crippling it will be at 40(if my lungs beat the anti-cig soothsayers' odds ie)

and all those infuriating "quotable quotes" on change just stating the obvious
there is no utopia this is it, at the maximum cycle within cycle within cycle utopia can exist only in the future in imagining a beautiful future you beatify your past your past

then you have to wait for history to repeat itself ..different actors, same story
because i dont want to believe that there will be happier times than then because the future can go wrong but the past was just right

you get reminded of your fragility daily
you realize that all your metaphysicizing disappears when ure broke or maybe it shifts from existentialism in an intuitive sense to survival in a physical sense maybe survival and existence are not mutually exclusive for, will you try to be one with the universe when youre dead hungry?
i think not i wouldnt be strange, not strange hunger cannot be an illusion, right?
so, from a discussion with a new friend, i gathered the following points

she thinks that we are here to learn something and that we choose people who will help us get there and that we keep facing obstacles throughout the means will be different but the goal is the same

i found that view very optimistic in a non sarcastic way.

so the body is a vehicle, as indian philosophy says profound so the body needs to be at ease before the mind can wander and ponder


consciousness is a strange thing there are times when you look at your hands as you open a door you feel every nerve, every cell you feel the illusion become real a touch is real, isnt it? wht is and isnt an illusion is not the point in the end for, you feel both, almost equally at times think of you doing something that you love like listening to your favourite song or so on, or even just lost in thought for a moment those moments make most sense when you dont question,ponder,seek,judge,define not happy, not unhappy. just there people try to achieve that state by meditation and the likes but in meditation, you control the mind in these random mistakes into oblivion, you do not they just happen an hour feels like a second only you dont keep track of how long that is when, to use a really banal phrase, you are one with the universe you just you.

no dependence, no affiliations, no distractions..youre distracted already you phase out.

is there any philosophy or science that explains this? or is it also an illusion?

another type of oblivion

vivekananda(the one philosopher i relate to, because he never extrapolates to superstition, does he?) said " you are closer to salvation playing football, than reading the Gita"

he was right..

i think he was describing this state or something close to it when your thoughts are just focused on the football and nothing else when you dont try to be the best player on the team when you dont dream of the goal and the your somersaults and the crowd
and you just play for the sake of nothing so maybe we need to work for work itself
all of us typing memos and spellchecking them using freaking Word are indeed pushing towards order in an earthly sense however in just working towards something feeling your body, your hands, your mind focus maybe we are getting close to an answer maybe that is the answer to contribute in thought, if not action to the survival of the human race so that years and years from now, someone might figure something out it stares straight in your face- progress,civilization,order people have died, storms have raged, what not but in a pure statistical sense, as a species,we are getting there maybe the selfish gene theory is indeed valid no absolutes, anyway, of course. let me know what you think

One More general thoughts follow now:
aah money
yes money
no, money

who invented it? apparently we did, considering the we are all from the same really horny forefathers and mothers

my professor has waived my life along with half my fee

the price you pay for a career

choose life, choose a career

me, i have no plans of being an environmental engineer if i can help it

again, i have to generate interest to just keep going

you know, the add water,soap,rinse,repeat,rinse,repeat routine

seems to apply to ANY job

even being a musician(which is my plan of course) seems redundant except for the music

everything is redundant

we all talk in cliches ...

each sentence we speak has phrases like "when it comes down to it" "as that old saying goes" etc

language is redundant

redundancy is life, indeed

the only escape is your imagination

if you dont have it, you must either be one of those focused on career people
or really unlucky..

but again all this pondering is of no use

dreams arent real
neither is love
and so on
they are just abstract
abstract is appealing because of its meaningfulness

ask some artist to explain his art and it loses its essence

its like in quantum physics...a state exists until you observe it
it collapses once you do observe it

duality is infinite

there is the many worlds theory that talks about parallel universes

if you dont contemplate, the thought exists
and if you do, it is just another thought

ahh, iam such a smart ass

anyone help me out with distinctions between real and imaginary?

i realise

hunger is real
physical pain is real

but things like love, etc as i have already dwelled upon, are not

just illusions

you believe because you want to believe
you want to believe because you dont want your life just a cycle of personal hygiene, mental loss, shares and bonds, your cars mileage, your next memo,etc

i have had experiences where i get jolted out of my dreamy state

walking down a road, dreaming

until a dog comes barking at me

i get jolted out of my senses

i feel fear

fear is real

even if youre schizo

again,apparently removal of certain glands in your body will ensure you dont feel a thing

no fear

no pain

what would happen then?

i believe there is a movie aptly named 'fearless' on this subject

anyone seen it? make sense?

what would you be if you cannot feel a thing

not even boredom

would you just work, eat,sleep, clean up

would you be a machine

propogating your kind

and another thing

this i think is a huge paradox

scenario 1: you are a 'thinker','dreamer',metaphysical entity..
and then someone you know dies,
this is from personal experience...i snapped out of my dreaminess...death is real...

scenario 2: you are a very practical person, who saves money, works hard etc, a complete non metaphysical entity
and then someone you know dies, start metaphysicizing! death is surreal to try to see if there is a big picture

what do you think?!

so there has to be a balance?
between imagination and realism?

what is the right amount of sugar to add?

again, these are ponderances which will just linger until the next jolt

again, survival and existence and all that shit

anyway, iam hungry, gotta stop dreaming and cook

there y'are...back on earth.

Strangely for me today I am at my best as for as blogging is concerned.. Got all the flow that was missing.. So much to say so many things have happened in past 10 days that kept me away from blogging any activities..


As i grow older and balder, the question of my identity is getting more twisted

whenever i see a blonde sorority girl, with perfectly plucked eyebrows, turn her snooty face away from me
whenever i see her boyfriend, big from all the beef, abercrombie and bitch, glare at me and then say something really funny to his ready to do it gf.
whenever i meet my colleagues in my lab and they go like "so you have bowling alleys in india?!! really? jeez"
whenever i meet my professor and he talks about him being the only white guy left in the lab casually in my presence
whenever i go the library and see someone look at me incredulously as if i have no right to be at the joseph heller shelf
whenever i walk back home and get eyeballed with pure disgust by big american ppl walking their american dogs who also seem to realise am not white
whenever i get asked by white people if iam a hindi and if i speak hindu
when i get vague 'ok's after i tell them am a hindu and i can speak hindi
when i get back to my apartment and get eyeballed by desis
when i get in and play rock music on the computer while KKDOOAPA is playing next door
when i watch desi flicks in the night on the computer and laugh and totally phase out
when i read american books
when i think of religion
is it just the language thats the problem or is it my attitude?
am i not indian?
i dont care if iam a hindu
i dont think iam a christian
iam a product of urban india
one of many confused ppl who cant figure out my identity
what does it mean to be an indian?
i hate indian politics and govt workers
i hate their sadistic guts when they make you run around the whole office for a signature
i hate my engineering teachers, total losers and misanthropes, sadists again
i hate my neighbours, when they peek into my house and gossip abt my family
i hate all those self righteous religious fucks who nod with disapproving empathy
i hate those people who beat up children so they can score 'centum's in maths
i hate those people who ogle at a white tourist like he is a god

why are we so in awe of everything western?
am not in awe of everything western cos am a so called anglophile

i think in english
i read english
i write english
i listen to english
i sing in english

thats it

plus i dont subscribe to any bigoted traditions and views

does that make me not indian?

so i must be superstitious, sanctimonious, US worshipping, bigoted, in love with bollywood films, in tune with anu maliks music, dying to play guitar for DDLJ's music, wear a kurta and pray and put vibhooti on my forehead, fall at the feet of sadistic 'elders',
say no evil, hear no evil, stand trembling at the visa counter...

to be an indian

well am a human being first and everything else next

so thats all my identity will be,,,in my own microcosm, i will listen to rock music, watch american sitcoms, read chuck palahniuk and JG Ballard and Joseph Heller, write in english, stick with pseudo-labeled little circles

tell all my colleagues that yes! we have bowling alleys in india, also we have pool tables!

yet, this is wht i really miss about home...chennai

home, idly,dosa, sambar, teashops,mylapore, marina beach, mental cops, crazy auto drivers, mylapore maamis, iyer uncles, rajnikanth movies,mallus,golts,dmk,admk,panneer soda, rosemilk, kulfi, smelly wineshops, smellier roads, dust, heat, sweat,water lorries, plastic pots, egg puffs, mallu bakeries, roadside chinese,chettinaad fish, chicken65,spencers,landmark,rickshaws,rock.

bessie, cozee, pandian wines(LOL), besant chinese roadside shop next to the bus stop,and then a movie at satyam and then chat at gangotree while ogling at stella mary's,rambling at landmark,..and then going to a teashop, tea and gold flake kings, and then buying clorets or ajantapaaku(LOL) to hide the beer smell. and then using all geographical skills to get home without being busted by a pot bellied maama..

thats what i miss

and yet am not an true desi a pseudo anglophile who wont appreciate anything indian.

Cheers ~

As I walked down the axle looking at the plush walls of the office, I missed a step to once again put my tie in its most accurate position.The reflection on the wall smiled at me smugly.The greyish speckled Zodiac tie with blackish blots looked well set on the light blue Louie Philippe shirt.( I made a mental note to make sure while sitting in the meeting that the symbol of "Upper Crest" is easily visible to people around the table, just to show how articulate Im when it comes to sartorial choices).
I was greeted at the expansive door of the mini-auditorium at the sexth floor, A wing by our demure Miss M, the lead lady of the evening , as expansive as the door."Hi, I was awaiting your second coming. I had this gut feeling that you would come again"
She's in love with me I guess. Atleast she's besotted with my personality and looks !!! Im sure I'm gonna charm her further with my impeccable presentation today. After the formal talks with all and sundry, I figured out it was time for me to go and check myself up in the mirror.I walked with a debonair gait to the Men's Room with an almost affected confidence that the inner self despised. Questions of morals can wait,the evening is for the conceited me. Next five minuted were spend in front of the life size mirror sizing myself up from various angles. ( As if I was trying out a new Levis from Shopper's Stop, Andheri). More or less satisfied with the creases of the trousers and the ironed out beauty of the shirt I looked at myself with a sort of sexual pleasure.Im falling in love with you, dear Mr. Reflection.Does that mean Im a gay ??!! Philosophy,dear mind, can also wait for another evening.As I came out from the restroom I almost banged into dear old Mr. Purohit. "Hey, your paper on the claims analysis for the last learning sharing module was fantastic." And forcibly took my hands and shook them." Why dont you appreciate my new hairstyle you sunofa @#$#@ ?? I almost mused aloud and then thinking of the impropriety of the same ,just allowed him to shake my hands, with a smile that would have made any toothpaste model proud.
The presentation was over. All of them are in awe of me. Im sure not many of them understood either the extremely abstruse concepts or the recondite mode of analytical attack employed. I belong to a higher echelon from where, may be, I can condescend to explain things more clearly to these jerks.Shit, I dont belong here. Oh but did I check myself up for sweat in the wrong place or an out of place strand of hair ??! Dear me, mirror here I come. I took the face wash from my personal pouch and washed my face, making sure the small bath towel spared any droplets spilling over to the "upper crest".Reapplied the gel to the hair. Waited a minute too long to enjoy my beauty ??! No.The sight does thrill me.You look smarter than you have looked in the recent past. But then the curve had always gone up.
During the question answer section , I was stunned by the ignorance all around me. Some people just dont understand my view point. How can people be so dumb as not to see the obvious ??!! And there was one person who even rejected my hypothesis. I dont really think he's an MBA from Wharton as he thinks he is !!! How can he ever get to Wharton ??! Or is it the general standards in WBS ?! I wouldn't ever go there even if I get a call. Maybe I should stick to Kellog's or even Insead or LBS !!!
When some smug looking jack ass was on the dias for defending his thesis, I asked the most erudite analogy that he would have ever heard, with lots of takes from Aristotlean Philosophy and Principle of Parsimony. That would show the world around that Im as good in Philosophy as Im in other fronts apart from making the "smug looking jackass" a "glum looking jackass".Good for him.
Years have passed by.
This life in asylum is getting into my nerves.I dream.I hallucinate.Im falling through a hole to an abyss.And endless chasm with the walls are embellished by small peices of mirrors.I cant hold on to something to have a look. I just fall.Deeper and deeper till the nurse comes with my daily dosage of Valium.

Cheers ~

I am so pissed off now.. Reason being the blog that I maintain in rediff is starting to irritate me... Seems like you cannot post a large blog... So came back to the one that I created sometime back...

Hope this works... Got so much to write today...