





The currency on above was deemed useless because this was worthless on the second day of its issue. The inflation has climbed up to mystery proportion that it seems better that the civil war breaks up anytime now !It is more interesting to see the news that with Zimbabwe dollars mostly available in bundles of 100,000 and 200,000 notes, one $100 note bought nearly 20 kilograms (40 pounds) of local notes at the new market rate Wednesday.
The above picture is for the cost of a beer !
It is amazing to read the news that a person who drives Honda City is living below the poverty line ! The government is busy embezzling the money that it does not have any corporate governance in place which would keep track of everything, from an account perspective. They just let everything go and it is quite weird that we are still dealing with such situations. Just sums up how much difficult it is here to rule the country.
A mark, a yen, a buck or a pound,
a buck or a pound, a buck or a pound,
Is all that makes the world go around,
that clinking clanking sound,
Can make the world go round.
If you happen to be rich, and you feel like a night's entertainment,
You can pay for a gay escapade.
If you happen to be rich, and alone and you need a companion,
You can ring ting-a-ling for the maid.
If you happen to be rich and you find you are left by your lover,
Tho you moan and you groan quite a lot,
You can take it on the chin,
call a cab and begin to recover on your fourteen carat yacht.
Money makes the world go around,
the world go around, the world go around,
Money makes the world go around,
of that we both are sure.
(Raspberry) On being poor.
When you haven't any coal in the stove and you freeze in the winter
And you curse to the wind at your fate.
When you haven't any shoes on your feet and your coat's thin as paper
And you look thirty pounds underweight,
When you go to get a word of advice from the fat little pastor,
he will tell you to love evermore.
But when hunger comes to rap, rat-a-tat, rat-a-tat, at the window
See how love flies out the door.
For money makes the world go around, the world go around,
the world go around.
Money makes the world go around,
the clinking, clanking sound
of Money, money, money, money,
Money, money, money, money,
Get a little, get a little,
Money, money, money, money,
Mark, a yen, a buck or a pound,
That clinking, clanking clunking sound
is all that makes the world go round,
It makes the world go round."
Joke time
Sensitive Beer
Three hicks were working on a telephone tower - Steve, Bruce and Jed. Steve falls off and is killed instantly.As the ambulance takes the body away, Bruce says, "Someone should go and tell his wife." Jed says, "OK, I'm pretty good at that sensitive stuff, I'll do it."Two hours later, he comes back carrying a case of beer.Bruce says, "Where did you get that, Jed?""Steve's wife gave it to me," Jed replies. "That's unbelievable, you told the lady her husband was dead and she gave you beer?"Well, not exactly", Jed says. "When she answered the door, I said to her, 'You must be Steve's widow'." She said, "No, I'm not a widow!"And I said, "I'll bet you a case of Budweiser you are.
Two guys are speeding through
The trooper responds, ''You're in
''I apologize sir, I'm not from around here.''
The trooper then walks to the passenger side of the car, and taps on the window. The passenger rolls down his window and the trooper takes out his club and smacks the passenger across the face.
''What was that for?'' asked the passenger.
''I know your kind,'' says the trooper, ''About two miles down the road you would have looked at your buddy and said 'I wish that son of a bitch would have tried that crap with me!'''
The CIA had an opening for an assassin.
The CIA had an opening for an assassin. After all of the background checks, interviews, and testing were done there were three finalists — two men and one woman. For the final test, the CIA agents took one of the men to a large metal door and handed him a gun.
"We must know that you will follow your instructions, no matter what the circumstances. Inside this room you will find your wife sitting in a chair. You have to kill her."The first man said."You can't be serious. I could never shoot my wife,"
The agent replies, "Then you're not the right man for this job."
The second man was given the same instructions. He took the gun and went into the room. All was quiet for about five minutes. Then the agent came out with tears in his eyes. "I tried, but I can't kill my wife." The agent replies, "You don't have what it takes. Take your wife and go home."
Finally, it was the woman's turn. Only she was told to kill her husband. She took the gun and went into the room. Shots were heard, one shot after another. They heard screaming, crashing, banging on the walls. After a few minutes, all was quiet. The door opened slowly and there stood the woman. She wiped the sweat from her brow and said, "You guys didn't tell me the gun was loaded with blanks. So I had to beat him to death with the chair."
A man with a pegleg, hook hand and...
A man with a pegleg, hook hand and an eyepatch went to apply to be a pirate.
Interviewer: How did you get that pegleg?
Pirate: Arrr. I got me leg shot off during the first world war.
Interviewer: How did you get that hook?
Pirate: I got me hand cut off by a big knife.
Interviewer: What about your eyepatch?
Pirate: It was a rainy afternoon and I looked up into the sky and a bird crapped in me eye.
Interviewer: And that put your eye out?
Pirate: No, it was the day after I got me hook.
That's A Buncha Bull
A man was visiting
"I've waited six weeks for bull balls. What are these?"
"Sir," the waiter said, "the bull doesn't always lose."
The Bottom Line
A cowboy rides his horse up to a saloon.
All the patrons gawked as the cowboy kissed his horse on the butt before coming in and asking for a drink.
The bartender serves him and asks, "Mind if I ask why'd ya kiss your horse on the butt?"
The cowboy says, "It's 'cause I got chapped lips."
The bartender asks, "Does manure help them heal?"
Cowboy replies, "No, but it keeps me from licking them."
Totally Bats
Two bats are going for their midnight feed.
After an hour or so, one bat gets tired of looking and goes home with no blood.
The other bat comes home with blood dripping from its mouth. The first bat says enviously, "Where did you get all that blood from?"
The second bat replies, "Follow me. I`ll show you."
After awhile the second bat leads them to a cave. He says, "You see that wall over there?"
The hungry bat excitedly says, "Yes!"
Other bat says, "I didn't.
Milking it
A woman and a baby were in the doctor's examining room, waiting for the doctor to come in.
The doctor arrived, examined the baby, checked his weight and found it somewhat below normal. The doctor asked if the baby was breast fed or bottle fed.
"Breast fed," the woman replied.
"Well, strip down to your waist," the doctor asked. She did. He pressed, kneaded, rolled, cupped, and pinched both breasts in a detailed, rigorously thorough examination.
Motioning for her to get dressed he said, "No wonder this baby is under weight! You don't have any milk."
"I know," she said, "I'm his grandmother, but I'm glad I came."
A lady walks into her doctors office ...
A lady walks into her doctors office screaming.
She yells, "Doctor, Doctor my breasts are hairy! What do I do?"
The doctor asks, "Well, how long does the hair grow?"
The lady replies, "From here to my penis, but that's a different story!"
Little
Little
"My goldfish died," replied
The neighbor was concerned, "That's an awfully big hole for a goldfish, isn't it?"
Irish Pub Sausage
Shamus and Murphy fancied a pint or two but didn't have a lot of money. Between them, they could only raise the staggering sum of one Euro.
Murphy said 'Hang on, I have an idea.'
He went next door to the butcher's shop and came out with one large sausage.
Shamus said 'Are you crazy? Now we don't have any money left at all!'
Murphy replied, 'Don't worry - just follow me.'
He went into the pub where he immediately ordered two pints of Guinness and two glasses of Jamieson Whisky.
Shamus said 'Now you've lost it. Do you know how much trouble we will be in? We haven't got any money!!'
Murphy replied, with a smile. 'Don't ! worry, I have a plan, Cheers!'
They downed their drinks. Murphy said, 'OK, I'll stick the sausage through my zipper and you go on your knees and put it in your mouth.'
The barman noticed them, went berserk, and threw them out.
They continued this, pub after pub, getting more and more drunk, all for free.
At the tenth pub Shamus said 'Murphy - I don't think I can do any more of this. I'm drunk and me knees are killin' me!'
Murphy said, 'How do you think I feel? I lost the sausage in the third pub !!!
My Father, The Whorehouse Piano Player
A grade school teacher was asking students what their parents did for a living. "Tim, you're first," she said. "What does your mother do all day?"
Tim stood up and proudly said, "She's a doctor."
"That's wonderful. How about you, Amie?" Amie shyly stood up, scuffed her feet and said, "My father is a mailman."
"Thank you, Amie," said the teacher. "What about your father, Billy?"
Billy proudly stood up and announced, "My daddy plays piano in a whorehouse."
The teacher was aghast and promptly changed the subject to geography. Later that day she went to Billy's house and rang the bell. Billy''s father answered the door. The teacher explained what his son had said and demanded an explanation.
Billy''s father said, "I'm actually an attorney, but how can I explain a thing like that to a seven-year-old?"
State Trooper
A state trooper pulls a car over for speeding. In the car is an old lady who is hard of hearing and her husband.
When the trooper asks the lady for her driver's license the lady responds, "Heh, what did he say?"
The old man speaks up as he says, "HE NEEDS YOUR DRIVER'S LICENSE."
A few minutes later the trooper comes back to the car and says, "Ma'am I see you're from
The old lady comments, "Heh, what did he say?"
The old man speaks up as he says, "HE SEES YOU'RE FROM
The trooper mutters, "Boy, one time, I got the worst piece of ass I ever had in
The old lady replies, "Heh, what did he say?"
The old man yells, "HE SAYS HE THINKS HE KNOWS YOU!"
The Wrinkled Nightgown
A man and wife were celebrating their 50-year anniversary, so the man bought his wife a $250 see-through nightgown.
Later that night she was getting ready for bed and realized the nightgown was still in the box downstairs. Walking naked through the house, she passed her husband who said, "My word, for $250 they could've at least ironed it!"
Respectfully Cheating
Jack and Betty are celebrating their 50th wedding anniversary.
"Betty, I was wondering -- have you ever cheated on me?"
"Oh Jack, why would you ask such a question now? You don't want to ask that question..."
"Yes, Betty, I really want to know. Please."
"Well, all right. Yes, 3 times."
"Three? When were they?"
"Well, Jack, remember when you were 35 years old and you really wanted to start the business on your own and no bank would give you a loan? Remember how one day the bank president himself came over to the house and signed the loan papers, no questions asked?"
"Oh, Betty, you did that for me! I respect you even more than ever, that you would do such a thing for me! So, when was number 2?"
"Well, Jack, remember when you had that last heart attack and you were needing that very tricky operation, and no surgeon would touch you? Remember how Dr. DeBakey came all the way up here, to do the surgery himself, and then you were in good shape again?"
"I can't believe it! Betty, I love that you should do such a thing for me, to save my life! I couldn't have a more wonderful wife. To do such a thing, you must really love me darling. I couldn't be more moved. When was number 3?"
"Well, Jack, remember a few years ago, when you really wanted to be president of the golf club and you were 17 votes short?"

In "The Reaping," Hilary Swank endures the 10 biblical plagues and takes on a backwoods Satanic cult. Having faced killer homophobes in "Boys Don't Cry" and deadly bedsores in "Million Dollar Baby," the two-time Oscar winner would seem perfect for the job of snuffing out evil.
But this long-delayed, pitiful excuse for a horror film feels like penance for her great success. She's all wrong for this sort of effects-drenched disaster picture, anyway. To get a sense of the incongruity, imagine Sally Field in her prime carrying, say, 1985's "Howling II."
"The Reaping" does have a kernel of campy promise. Swank plays professor Katherine Winter , an ex-missionary minister who, after losing her entire family in some Sudanese blood rite, trots the globe using science to debunk supposed miracles. She's a merciless, atheistic Lara Croft, kicking the poor and the hopeless while they're down. But since this is the rare horror film about the power of belief, we quickly know she'll have the bejesus scared back into her by the time it's over.
After overturning her 48th purported miracle in Chile, Katherine returns home to Louisiana State University, where she's greeted by David. He plays a schoolteacher who provides Katherine with her biggest case yet.
A river in his little bayou town, hilariously called Haven , flows with blood, and the townsfolk have placed the blame on a blond girl (AnnaSophia Robb ) who was found nearby with her dead brother. They think she murdered him.
The schoolteacher tells Katherine that the town is convinced this is the start of the plagues. Sure enough, when she arrives with her co-worker Ben (Idris Elba ), a practicing, religiously tattooed Christian, the countdown begins: a hail of frogs, a swarm of locusts, diseased livestock, nasty boils on the skin, etc.
In Exodus , the plagues were calamities that God wrought on the Egyptians for enslaving the Israelites . But Katherine is unmoved, offering a perfectly natural rationalization for it all. Such explanations require Swank to speak in paragraphs that illuminate her literacy but not her talent. Well this paragraph is where she basically relates the plagues in the past with scientific arguments. Quite phenomenal those but then the crowd watching the movie in Madras, India, is so retarded that they just can't have the patience to see the long dialogues. The idiots clap but I would have frowned in my usual senses but then their appreciation was sort of more timing centric. She needed that clap for an amazing dialogue delivery !
She may rely on facts, but Katherine's unconscious has a mind of its own. She has nightmares of the Sudan and sex fantasies about the schoolteacher. She also has to figure out why her old priest friend (Stephen Rea , looking suitably embarrassed) keeps insisting she's in danger.
The screenplay never credibly explains what's going on. Not after one viewing -- and that was enough for me, thank you. None of what we discover is ever interesting enough to make us care . The story vaguely cribs from "The Wicker Man ," "Rosemary's Baby ," "The Exorcist ," and "The Omen ," but doesn't come close to the lasting fright of any of those titles. And why drag Louisiana or Sudan into any of this, only to portray the people who live there as insultingly backward ?
Stephen Hopkins directs "The Reaping" according to the Satanic horror manual, right down to the choral chanting on the soundtrack. The lighting is often too dark to see what's happening, and the editing makes a mess of even the most tolerable scenes (the locust attack, for example). Like most of these movies, the film is cut like a trailer for a horror flick instead of being a horror flick proper. And the staging of the final sequence is laughable. Surrounded by explosions, and computer effects worthy of any Atari game, the actors appear to be standing around while a wind fan blows and wondering how they would look like in the big screen. I was kinda vexed as the movie was drawing to a closure.
Swank, of course, is a trouper, playing a part meant for an actor with a quarter of her fame and half her Oscars. But would Sarah Michelle Gellar even have dared?
You expect the cheapo B-movie producers to try to trick the occasional drunk movie renter into believing their cheapie flick sitting on the videostore shelf is that big movie currently showing in theaters, but the big studios? Don’t they have PR budgets for new, original posters?
Here’s the “10,000″ BC poster side by side with the “300″ one it’s mimicking.
Also, to remember that the cheap, ineffective graphics are never the original imposing effects. 300 had it whilst this movie tries to run out with the idea but then as a viewer of this movie one cannot but help compare everything, every action with the older movies - 300 or Apocalypto. The first Mammoth hunt down had such a lousy special effects that in one scene the Mammoth actually runs over the leg of Steven Strait. Then he brings the Mammoth down with a dagger straight in the throat of it. Just one is sufficient to bring the Mammoth down like pack of cards. I believed the stunt hoping the going would get better. Nope, I was just sitting on a pile of shit the director was throwing at me !